LIFE.

Before you say anything, she's not nigerian. THANK YOU, JESUS. I think she's from ghana. hahahahahhaha ....urmm okay.

Why this video is amazing?

• The beats sounds like something the neptunes would have produced. #FACT
• She looks like beyoncccccccccc
• She's an fantastic rapper, i think she could be the new nicki minaj? no? I THINK SO.

Can we also discuss her lace weave? HOW GREAT IS IT?
hagghsahdgshdghdshdhghgashgdhgsdaghddghdhdh

Overall, i think this is in my top favourite 10 songs.

BLEURGH

My photographer mate Agnė Ališauskaitė took some test shoots photoorros of me a few weeks ago and im just seeing 'em now. Can i say how fresh do i look? like i mean, like fresh ..of the boat. URMMMM.

Top: American apparel
Short: Levis
Shoes thigy majig: Converse

IS THIS A JOKE?

HAHAHHHHHHHHHHHHHAHHAAAAAAAAAAAAJDHJSADHJHADHSJHSDJJSDJ
just when you think the amazing and highly insightful composer..LIL B couldnt top that infamous 'ellen degeneres' video.
he releases this......
IS THIS 4 REALLZZZ???
WAS THIS FOR...CHARITY???
AHHJAHSJHSAKJSKSJASJKJKSJKSJKSJKSJS
IM ACTUALLY CRYYYYING RIGHT NOW
because my guy even attempted to ..sing.
               **funmi walks off cliff**

SISTA BIG BONES

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EPIC FAYUL.

NATIONALKISSINGDAY

Oh crap. that was yesterday.
urgh.
oh well.

CHESS.

STOP LOOKING, hoe.

Alright amigas. hows it going?? good yeah? #LOLjk i dont care.

basically do you know whats been bugging me?

people who JUST look.

and dont do anything

and they are like' why is blahdiblah featured in id magazine?' 'what she EVEN do?'

urmm WHAT IS YOUR BUZZZINESSS? WAITIN DER CONCERN YOU?

...i mean, what are YOU doing?

im sorry but every week you're picture is tagged in the bangbang album?

...but yet you STILL work at dorothy perkins, doe?

....even though you're a part stylist/part-blogger

like srriuusly?

Y U JEALUZZZZ 4?

Do you ever think if you spent some time AT HOME perfecting your craft whatever it and NOT jallabanting in hoeditccch, ...this could be improving your djing, writing, singing or even academic skills...you might just see the amazing results.

HUH?

but noooooooooooooooooooooo, you'd ready hate on other peeps, init?

urgh.

meh

okay. i thought so.

The point is, dont look at what other people are doing, FOCUS ON YOURSELF.

::drops mics and gully creeps off stage::

TOTAL B A B E

THE STORY OF MY LIFE.

CRACK EPITHANY.

G A Y

I hate the way you talk to me, and the way you cut your hair. I hate the way you drive my car, I hate it when you stare. I hate your big dumb combat boots and the way you read my mind. I hate you so much it makes me sick, it even makes me rhyme. I hate the way you’re always right, I hate it when you lie. I hate it when you make me laugh, even worse when you make me cry. I hate it when you’re not around, and the fact that you didn’t call. But mostly I hate the way I don’t hate you, not even close… not even a little bit… not even at all.

WANT.

THANK YOU.

HAYE IS GONNA GET MURKED.

RIVAH IS OLD NOW.

Soo the other day my mate rivah turned the big 2.0...ekkk. mans getting old still. she was looking finneee sha and mans wannted to move to that, STILLLLLLLLLLLLLL but tbh, im just happy for all the things she's achieved sooo far and i know, there's moreee to come.

ps: she can be uberly meechy at times

disclaimer: apologises for the old jenny tune. rivah kinda loves it.

truth.

THIS.

ONESTOWATCH: BAFIC

I caught up with photographer and illustrator bafic on his buuurrday which he cancelled because he was waayy too busy drawing letters whilst listening to drake in his boxers. NICE.

funmiwang: how's its going, bruh??
bafic: I'm Good today is my birthday and i'm sitting here in my grey vest and boxers listening to music hahah **i bet 5 people just got an image**
funmiwang: yes, haha they probably did.
bafic: how are you?
funmiwang: urmm well, im alright. OBVIOUSLY watching loose women cuz im a middle aged white woman.
funmiwang: ohh happy birthday btw, whatcha doing for it?
bafic: haha ha thank you
funmiwang:oh A W E S O M E (why?)
bafic:err nothingg i told everyone my birthday is canceled
funmiwang:too personal?
bafic: haha well mehh i dont wanna turn this into a filled drake verse
bafic: ghahga
funmiwang: BLEURGHH.okay.

funmiwang: soo about your photography shizzzz...how did you get into? i realised you mostly shoot on analog, why?
bafic: because i cant afford to buy a camera at the moment so instead of making one big purchase on a camera i make Loads of small purchases spent on film, developing, printing, etcc. i think since i started i have spent enough money to buy a camera......but that is over the span of 3 yearss
funmiwang: most of your photos are mainly filled with treees and LOADS of greenerry.
bafic:yeah where i live is pretty boring every now and then i photograph people.....people are better.pictures are great you only get the one image........you don't get you see or hear the conversation that was had before i took the picture you have no idea what the person is like so you see a picture of a woman with her dogs and can only imagine what sort of person she is.....how she talks, what she likes in life...what she hates.... sometimes i don't even know....

funmiwang: DEEP (no innuedo) but do you think you'll ever make a move from your more documentary style to fashion shitt?
bafic: YESS, i will.In Recent years we have had an major increase on street style....cliched beautifull people dressed in pretty hues of browns, blues, leathers and denim. and it's getting abit boring. *yawns*
bafic:For a long time i have always thought the older people and the homeless people and the skaters where i live are the best dressed.i have been seeing the older people walking their dogs every morning in their tan chourdroys, leather shoes and barbour jackets looking soo frikking coool but i could never tell what it was

bafic: The homeless men who rock the green Ma1's with those arabian scalves it's amazing

funmiwang: YESSSSS.
bafic: the street style we see on the internet alot of people are just so mesmorized with this idea that if you dress like a 60 year old man when you are 20 you have 'style'
whaatt?
...how does that even make sense...wait NONE of what i'm saying is making sense and this is stuff i have been thinking about
Peoples style isn't aging naturally

funmiwang: i get what you mean, what IS STYLE?
bafic: it's like people are taking surgury to make them look older that meaning people are dressing up 'old' missing different moments in their life. this is hard to explain. hmmm *thinks of a metaphor*
funmiwang: haha
bafic: people are running up the stairs of "style" and there missing certain vital steps that shape what they will look like at 60yrs old because of this they are falling and failing miserbally at look like a 60yr man who has lived life, met beautiful people, gone through life etc and instead they look like someone who was locked outside their house and had to borrow their dads clothes for work
including awkward looks when they walk down the street chin up looking like a idiot

bafic: ahhhhmm oh yeah style.. what IS style?
funmiwang: YES.hmmm eek whatever you feel confortable in, i guess. soo whats future planssss???

bafic: hmm i wanna put on a show but do it a little different....i'm not sure yet. i wanna do a coffee table book....on the most boring and obsure random theme
funmiwang: coffee table book?? haha.you're actually trapped in an 80 year old man's body
bafic: haha yess, imagine if i did a book called "Things i have found on the floor and kept. it would be soooo dope but hmm what else do i wanna do? errr i wanna shoot this girl i always see at the train station mmm
i wanna shoot her with my camera not a glock
funmiwang: inneudo much?

 

 CHECK OUT HIS SITE:  www.bafic.co.uk
www.flickr.com/photos/bafic

BEST THING SINCE CHEESE AND TOAST.

"I SAW MY LOVE ON FACEBOOK"

JhjshhhhHHAHHAHJAHJjsjjjhhahahahhaah im actualllly crying. THIS SONG IS AAAAAAAAAAAAAMAZING. HOW CAN THE CHORUS GO 'my facebook love, im waiting for your message on my wall'...with additional youruba adlibs.

PHAHAHAJAHJAAJSHSJDHJSHJSAHJD



WHY THE VIDEO IS JOKES?

• the chicks lies about her age for facebook.
• she uses a picture of a model on her FACEBOOK PICTURE!!!
• then....in the end they randomly see eachother and they are just 'urmm eurghh you're butterz fam'

then 3.34-3.37 the guy is like having a cold shower whilst WRITING ON HER WALL.

AHGHSGHAGSAG WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?

OH SHIT. I LOVE BEING NIGERIAN!!!

B A B E

WAYNE GOT WEAVE.

im OBVIOUSLY late in discovering this jabbajintis that my uncle rooney did.

Aparently he was being teased by his dickface team mates for having farrrr back hair line... NOW he has this fake asss lace thigy majig on his head.

IS IT BY FORCE??

Y MUST YOU TWEET THIS PHOTO ASWELL?

DOES IT MAKE YOU HAPPY?

HUH?

HUH?

*sighs*

WHAAAAAAAAAT?

                                               It gets meechy from 0.53 onwards.

I got the cool aid.

Basically this is my 5 reasons why i love sleigh bells

• the bass is so fresh that i have to drink orange juice, just so i don't get blown away.

• they do this kind of im-not-really-rapping-rap thing that i like, without being ghetts

• Derek miller (the guy) aside from being a pretty fit bastard, he used to be in a hardcore band called poison the well ( there weren't half bad as it happens)

• anyone who listens to their self tittled 2009 EP will definitely belong to the faith, although there current album is a tad on the commercial side , they are still true to their original sound, which is why even if they weren't as good looking as they collectively are i would still cream for them.

• after seeing them being interviewed they act exactly as i thought they would, modest but erringly still cool and brutally HONEST like a 10 dollar hooker to a priest.

also i would like to ADD that as an avid SLEIGH BELLS fan , i resent that when i went on you tube and typed them in search, all i got was shit about some stupid beer advert that was blatant east London hipster propaganda . either that or people were going on about the shit US version of skins (AND YOU ALL KNOW HOW I FEEL ABOUT REMAKES!!)

then some cunt started talking about a less than average Taylor foetus-face Lautner movie. i dont care if this makes me sound like a music snob, but people that think of music in terms of record sales or soundtrack to some shitty fox series SHOULD BE SHOT AT DAWN!

peace pussy pies

XX BYRON

p.s im back from Canne and will make the next post French focused :)